I have been reading a book called “You are a badass….How to stop doubting your greatness and start living an awesome life” by Jen Sincero. This book has so much good content that I decided to share my thoughts about her thoughts. If you want your own copy of this book, click the link below 🙂
When was the last time that you physically hurt yourself?
Did you sit and suffer through the pain or did you try to relieve the pain to get some relief?
I would be willing to bet that you did everything that you know to do to relieve the pain for yourself. You poured hydrogen peroxide on that open wound knowing that it would hurt a little but in the end would cause the healing. You went to the doctor for those stitches because you knew that the pain of stitches would ultimately lead to your wound healing or you had your broken ankle set because you know that it needs to be back in place for proper healing to begin! Am I right?
Now think about the last time you were emotionally hurt!
How fast were you to fix the emotional pain? I’m willing to bet that you suffered way longer with the emotional pain than you did the physical pain.
Why do we think that we need to endure so much torture, hang on to our own guilt and shame? We drag out our own emotional pain by playing the “blame game”! “Well if my mother-in-law would just mind her own business then I wouldn’t be fighting with my husband/wife right now”, “if my boss would have given me the raise I wanted/needed then I wouldn’t be struggling financially right now”, “if my friend would have been more sensitive to my needs then I wouldn’t have responded the way I did”! Do these sound familiar?
We don’t just think these thoughts, process them and then move on. We keep them alive in our minds! Reliving them over and over and over again. Picking at the wounds that are trying so hard to heal, refusing to let the healing begin and the pain subside until we have made everyone around us just as miserable as we are because we need them to know we are right. We may not do this intentionally but we do it nonetheless! We hang on to the wrongs and ill feelings until they make us physically sick. Why?
Holding on to all of the resentment and negative feelings is not going to change a thing! Do you know what it does do? It keeps you a prisoner in your own mind and body. It keeps all of the feelings of you being wronged alive in your mind!
Forgiveness isn’t about saying the other person was right, it is about taking care of you! It’s about taking responsibility for yourself. Don’t give them power over your actions and emotions. Give those feelings the boot!! “The moment you decide to forgive and let your negative feelings melt away, you are on your way to freedom”; “Holding on to resentment is like taking poison and waiting for your enemies to die” – Jen Sincero
So, how do we do this? How do we get rid of those negative emotions and forgive those who have wronged us?
I get it! You want to be right because that person was wrong and you want them to pay for how they hurt you! But what if instead you decided that it’s more important that you are happy instead of right?! Find that place where you can go and have your yelling fit, beat on something until it breaks, cry and tell God how unfair it is and then move on…make that choice to be happy instead of holding on to all the negative! Be intentional about how you are going to respond!
Do you know that hanging on to negative feelings can actually cause physical sickness? Don’t let those negative emotions have so much power over you!
Love yourself because you deserve it!!
Jen Sincero is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, speaker, and success coach who has helped countless people transform their personal and professional lives via her newsletters, products, seminars, public appearances, and books.
As always, thanks for reading and I hope today has a good you!!